Sometimes I Hang On A Little Too Much To Old Memories

QQ and Yiya both moved back to China from different parts of the world within this past week. I can't help feeling a little left out. I have absolutely no reason to. I used to be the only one outside of the Chinese border among our high school friends and never felt there was anything wrong with that. But things were simple back then. There were no other alternative paths but to finish college, within a reasonable time. No matter where we were in the world, we were all still working towards the same goal.

Then sometimes during college, both QQ and Yiya and many other high school friends came out of China and become scattered in US, Europe and Asia.

Then it's time to say bye bye to college. We now have many choices presented to us. Many moved back to China. Some of us stayed. I haven't regret my choice of staying. But after I heard that both QQ and Yiya had arrived safely in Dalian, I started to feel a little scared: Scared of the unforeseeable consequence of my choice. Scared that my path will take me further and further away from them after this week. Scared that I would no longer be able to relate to them, to share the many feelings and fears....

It looks like when I said bye bye to college I also waved goodbye to the days of my invincible youth.

There is this website where you can send post cards to them. On the post card, you can write down a secret or draw an image of a secret that you never told anyone before. They will put the post card on the website anonymously.

I guess my post card would be something like this:
A childish drawing of me waving with a handkerchief in my hand. On the left corner, two small figures walking away from me one after another. In the middle there is a line goes across the post card. Next to the line is my handwriting in blue ink: I will miss you very much... more so than I will worry about myself being left behind.